I mentioned in a previous post that our number one fear is being rejected. And as simple as it sounds to just "get over it" fear can be a very paralyzing thing. If you are afraid of people rejecting you or you're afraid of failing or looking stupid then it can keep you from even trying.
I don't think there is a such thing as fearlessness. I think everyone has some fear or trepidation everyday but what makes you badass is when you're afraid but you move forward anyway.
I mean seriously, what's the worst that can happen? Now of course I'm not referring to jumping out of a plane because well. . . . . But speaking in front of a crowd, singing a song, starting a business. . .what if you fail at those things? Is it the end of the world? No! It just means you can check that off your list and move on to your next great idea. Besides what if you're totally awesome at it? Don't deny the world your gift or idea because you're too afraid to try. Now if you jump out of an airplane, just be sure you have your parachute!
Dialogue is one of the most important elements of a story, in my opinion. I know some people would disagree and say plot or setting is crucial. But for me it has always been about dialogue. I love being able to give my characters an actual voice to say things and express themselves in ways that I wish I could! And in ways that hopefully allow the reader to connect with the story.
I like dialogue with witty banter and informed opinions. I usually start writing with dialogue and build the rest of the story around a conversation between two characters.
I think this process could be useful in real life as well. Often all it takes is a little bit of dialogue to spark a conversation about life, to apologize, to clear misunderstandings, to state intentions or to begin a relationship.
The culprit for lack of communication today is technology. It's so easy to email or text or even send a DM on social media that we neglect to really TALK to one another and the result is sometimes disastrous:
We often tell little children to "use their words" instead of non-verbal clues like pointing whining or crying when they want something. I think it's time adults start following this same bit of advice.
It is not the strongest of the species that survives; nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is most adaptable to change.-- Charles Darwin
Whenever we're faced with change in our life it is a natural reflex to resist but change is inevitable and if you don't accept it and adapt you won't survive. Here are a few tips for embracing change:
1. Don't take it personal.- Most of the time when something changes you aren't the only one affected, so stop making yourself a victim. Look at the big picture and understand that at the end of the day it has absolutely nothing to do with you.
2. Make it work to your advantage.- Think about how the change could benefit you, make it work for you instead of against you.
3. Don't worry.- Change is NOT the end of the world, so don't stress too much because the situation or condition won't last forever. . .things will change again!
In a recent article from O Magazine, Dr. Phil stated: Acceptance is our #1 need and rejection is our #1 fear. How profound is that? It explains so much about human nature. We try so hard to fit in and please others because we don't want to be cast out or isolated. We want people to like us and that's fine. . .but some of us go too far. We care too much what other people think and we end up living our lives to please other people instead of ourselves.
It's not the idea it's what you do with it. -Neil Gaiman
Anyone can come up with an idea but not everyone can execute those ideas. I've been known to fill up pages of a writing tablet with ideas of things I want to do but I've never acted on them. So I basically wasted all that paper.
Unless you move forward with the courage, know how and discipline to follow through then your ideas are pretty useless.
Writer. Reader. Designer. Creative Spirit.
“I would advise anyone who aspires to a writing career that before developing his talent he would be wise to develop a thick hide.”